Saturday, 28 February 2009


on andyville

Various writers have explored the topic of love sex and dating to the best of their knowledge and probably their life experiences. Experience ! now that interests me. Being a realist to the core i believe in the practicalities of life and not theories. Okay enough with the ambigous writing and lets get down to business. If that is the case i think we should change this topic to dating, love and sex. hmmm now that looks better.

TRUTH: Every guy has a gameplan from the moment he sets his eyes on a lady and its mostly in this sequence; sex, to flaunt her to my friends, to be friends with her or “i’m getting old and need to get married before my family thinks i’m gay”etc. Ladies please get a grip and show this guys that you aint hungry. You meet this guy who looks cool, good job, fancy car (maybe daddy’s), intentionally forgets money on his dashboard for you to see and you fall for it in most cases. A date should be for the sake of spending time together and getting to know each other. Its not about the guy trying to get the ladies drunk so they could “score”. Any guy who cant get a lady’s opinion when she’s sober should go and watch hitch by will smith. All i’m trying to say is that we should get our priorities straight. Ladies should ask to watch movies rather than just a drink or a cheap meal at mcdonalds, biggs or chocolate royal. A guy may have sex on his mind at first glance but a lady can prove him wrong and this could lead to love. Take myself as an example, all my serious relationships were as a result of the lady being extremely cold to me or refusing to give me their number and so i had to persevere and it led to me persevering for a whole lot of things and i found myself serious with them. In other words we started dating. But thats just my experience and i guess robert greene will tell you something else. Ps throw away all those dating books and improve on your interaction with friends. The first thing to get in your head is that every single \ Girl can be caught—and that you'll catch her if \ You set your toils right.

If you ask me, love is the most overrated and most misunderstood word, concept, theory, paradigm bla bla bla in the world. By now you should understand how i write (cynically) so its up to you to skip this column and move on or enjoy the blunt truth i have to offer you. When i was in the university, i discovered that my sociology lecturers succeeded in defining everything as “relative” example: society-relative, culture-relative, crime-relative. If they were asked to define love i guess they would have described it as relative. The point is that whatever you define love as, be reasonable enough to respect it and live up to your definition of love. I feel most people mistake lust for love at first sight (besides there’s a thin line between love and hate, right!). The average human is basically a capitalist and thats why we choose to own and posses people in the name of love. So i think love grows, infatuation flies and a crush is meant to be crushed. Bottom line is- love is actually relative so whatever you believe love is, show it to that (ONE) you love. Like chandler and monica in friends. They say love lives in strange places. Sex lives everywhere fortunately and unfortunately. Dont shoot me (i was forced by my editor to write this)

THE TOPIC WE ARE MOST HYPOCRITICAL ABOUT. We love it but claim not to. We were told its only meant to be within the confines of marriage but how many married men/women are faithful. Thats none of my business but most relationships start because of sex and ends because of sex. most guys tell the ladies that sex sustains a relationship; breaking news: big lie. What use is a suprise if it is unwrapped. Ladies like the chase, guys can wait for the game so know when to say no. Its like eating food. Three meals in one day, morning-rice noon-rice dinner-rice. Belive me tomorrow you will want beans. You have to pardon my blunt nature but for all that is good, lets use the parts of our brains that work hence try to date (know the person), fall in love (if possible get married) before the big S. My girlfriend will kill me for not practicing what i preached in this column but hey! I’m no black eyed pea in “where is the love”

life is like a book. You either write it or it writes you. There’s no guideline to love, sex and dating. The above commentary is just one out of 40 billion in the world so hey, do it your own way but play safe.



  1. the flashing of 'accidental cash' in the pigeon hole is more of a turn off for me, if u've got to prove something then u aint got it...
    i appreciate fine meals at beautiful resturants, but that doesnt guarantee a relationship with me, or a peak at my undies or even grazing of lips and tasting my saliva(urgg why does kissing suddenly sound gross).
    it takes more than VIP treatments at clubs, flashy cars, expensive gifts to impress me(yes sometimes i might actually gasp at the extremity. but ask those who've flashed it all at me, they'll call me a hard to impress winsh)
    i appreciate spending time with a guy and knowing i'm laughing from deep within and not giving that fake smile taht keeps the cheeks hurting, extra point if he appreciates the arts and follows me for those theatre plays and poetry readings i go for....that makes me stop to think, that maybe, just maybe it might work out between us

    i've been tagged ice queen or hard to get or whatever, but i guess like u said, every single girl can be caught, maybe i might just let myself catchable to some lucky guy someday soon, and it wouldnt be his flashy car that'll bait me to the net.

    we've all mistaken lust for love at one point in our lifes, lots of marriages today are built on lust, thats why we have so many divorces.
    many have underrated love,it's not overrated like you say...
    we've all belittled the natural power of love with the steriod pumped emotions of lust.
    dont ask me to explain but thats what my guts tells me and i'll stick with it.

    sex is overrated,
    i'm now waiting for marriage cos its just not worth the trouble. no matter how mind blowing it feels sometimes, it'll only make sense if theres love involved.
    i get tempted to break this new resolve, but i'm stronger than the tempters bait...

    so maybe i might have blabbed and gone off point here, but who cares? talks about sex, love and dating causes one to blab.

  2. you sure made a lot of sense there Fantasy Queen, you sure did :)

  3. I never get tired of reading about Dating Love and Sex.