I am alone in the dark. I love the dark. No light not even that blinking red notification light of my BB. Just beautiful perfect darkness. My golden noir I call it. I can see in the dark you know, well just the images my mind and I come up with. They are usually beautiful and sparkly. I have some ugly ones too but I do my best to suppress them ugly ass images. I hate to ruin my Golden Noir, I don’t get it as often as I want.
Earphones in my ears, music blaring at the highest volume (I love me some loud music). I’m in the mood for some Gregorian chant but I am too comfortable and I am scared if I stretch to get my phone I won’t be able to get this very comfy position again. Plus, I really don’t want to ruin the darkness with the bright back light of my phone. Anyway, music shuffles itself to Brandy and Monica’s latest song ‘It all belongs to me’. I love this song and I don’t get why peopledon’t. The video even makes it more loveable for me. Not necessarily the concept but the clothing and styling totally gets me.
I’m pulling my Gangsta in bed singing along with Brandy and Monica "I know you're mad/Can't take no more/But put that back, that ain't yours/Have a fit, slam the door/But leave them bags on the floor/That shit belongs to me", bla bla bla... Song plays out and a strange French song starts playing. I dint even know I still had this strange song on my phone. I should delete it. My mind wanders back to the Monica and Brandy song.
Should we really take back everything when we are done with someone we were in a relationship with? The clothes, the cars (TAKE THAT BACK ALREADY), the rings etc. What should we take back and what do we overlook? Is it mature or does it spell immature to the last letter? I remember a friend of mine who went to her Ex flat, packed up all the (silly) things she had given him when they were dating and brought them back to her apartment. What are you going to do with these I had asked? I dunno, trash it I guess she replied. I just don’t want anything we shared in his possession. I imagined me going to my (now) Ex's apartment and taking the wine opener, the plates, the clothes (few) I bought for him etc with the ‘That shit belongs to me’ attitude. I can’t, I just can’t imagine it! But, if I had bought him a car I’ll want that back with the millage reading 0.00km! :D
However, there are something’s I would want back. The ‘TIME’ wasted with you. That’s not a waste if you think it through. We shared some damn good times and then your sorry ass(or my sorry ass) ruined things but I still want it back. I want my saliva back, the ones we swapped while kissing. I want my sweat (you know how that came about) back. I want the wetness of my trocha back. I want the soft moans of our love making back.I want my hymen back. I want the climax I gave to you; I’ll save it and give it to someone else. I want all my stories back! I want my secrets back! I want the meals I cooked for you! I want, I want, I want...
Hell, it all belongs to me!
Ooooowwwweeeeeeee, music has shuffled itself to the Gregorian chant – Masters of the chant. Bliss!!! I love these monks.